My whole adult life, I have heard mixed messages about my particular body type. I have heard that I have the coveted hourglass figure; large bust, small waist, big hips and ass. I have been told that most men like big butts. Here are a few lyrics that echo this sentiment:
“I like big butts and I cannot lie
You other brothas can’t deny
When a girl walks in with a ity bitty waist and a round thing in yo face
You get sprung”
“You can do side-bends or sit-ups, but please don’t lose that butt!”
By Sir-Mix-e-Lot
“As I walk you to the dance floor
We begin to dance slow (oooh)
Put your arms around me
I'm feeling on your booty ” By R Kelly
“Boys like a little more booty to hold at night” By Meghan Trainor
“Big, big booty
What you got a big booty
Big, big booty
What you got a big booty
Big, big booty
What you got a big booty
Big, big booty
What you got a big booty” By J to the L.O.
Oh no! What if I lose my booty?! I”m sure I will. But maybe I won’t. But I’m sure I will. Will the shape stay the same? I like the shape of my butt, except there’s just so much of it. When I walk into someone’s house, backyard or office, I size up the chairs like a boxer sizing up their opponent. “Hmmm, will it fit my hips and ass? Will it be painful or just uncomfortable? Will it look like I’m sitting ON the chair instead of IN the chair? Is there another place I can sit, like a bench or couch or something? Don’t even get me started with picnic tables. Can’t tell you how many times I’ve been the first to sit down first with my food, swang my legs around (awkwardly) under the table, only to have the whole damn thing start to tip my way. Talk about a jump-scare!
Honestly, these songs make me wonder if I will still be sexy once I have broken up with half of me. My family traits remind me that, no matter how much breaking up is done, I will still have hips and ass. Is that what makes me sexy though? I’d like to think it’s my kind eyes, hearty laugh and genuine disposition. Will my hugs feel as welcoming without a soft landing? Will I be as strong as I am now? Or will I be stronger? I think that this journey will be more of a mental strength test than a physical one. Or maybe it’s both/and.
I can’t wait to be comfortable, as I learn to become comfortable with only half of me. I hope that, at my core, I am full of spirit, smiles, personality, generosity and love.
Much more than B double 'O' TY - oh my!
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